Goodbye Mary




Mary and I met in high school but we didn’t become close friends until later. We became friends in a very odd way. I think the trivial start of our actual friendship really jump started our bond. We became immensely close in a very short amount of time. I was very grateful for our friendship and that she was in my life.

I surprised her when I returned home from college and it a beautiful time. I felt so loved by the way she received me. This was the first time that we spent time together one on one in real life. I believe this made our friendship even stronger. I was so happy she was in my life. She really understood me when I talked, and I felt like I could tell her everything. And at this point in my life, there was a lot going on so I appreciated having her close to me. I leave to go overseas for an internship and we continue video chatting back and forth.

Our friendship loses a little bit of its fervor but that’s still okay. We still are super close, that same super high energy no longer exists. But that’s okay because realistically what friendship can stay up there all the time?

I come back from my internship abroad and we continue on. I get on the airplane to go back to college when she texts me about some supposed rumor that I created about her.

I try and defend myself but she doesn’t seem receptive to what I have to say. I felt so hurt. Why would she trust some other person that she just met over her close friend? I remember calling her over the phone and how she sounded so mad at me. She says so passive aggressively, “Okay! I trust you. If you say you didn’t do it then you didn’t do it.”

I really wish she just believed me. That was around two years ago. I reached out to her yesterday to see if she just wanted to talk. I just wanted to apologize for dropping the ball in our friendship and how it was not fun to drift apart. Even though I didn’t start that rumor, I still wanted to apologize. Her reply showed me that she wanted nothing to do with me. It’s so tough to lose a close friend because of a rumor. We are grown adults. Why did we let something like that happen?

Her reply made me sad. It’s such a curious phenomenon to have somebody close to you then all of a sudden they’re strangers. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.

So goodbye Mary. I wish we were still friends. I wish you still wanted to be my friend. I am so happy that you were in my life at one point, but I am so sad that you are no longer. I wish you only the very best and peace and happiness and love and love and love. I remember how we used to talk about inviting each other to our own weddings. Those are just empty promises now. Goodbye Mary.

Please reach out to someone you care about who you haven’t talked to in a long time.


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