The most interesting thing that happened today:

I was eating hazelnuts, loving them, when I smelled something rancid. Like straight ass. I audibly said, “Oh no. Oh no.” I got up, looked at my sisters dog that I reluctantly agreed to watch. There was two fat piles of dog diarrhea. The dog was just laying there, innocent like nothing happened. The smell now was so unbearable. I told the dog to get the heck outside. I walked around for five minutes, not knowing what to do, not knowing how to clean these two piles. I finally found some plastic gloves and resolved to squirt blue toilette cleaner on it, mixing the two smells, not sure if it helped. I used 3/4 of a roll of two ply toilette paper to clean it up. I gagged maybe six times while scoping the shit into the plastic bag. I let this event ruin my day and realized if a dog pissed me off this much, how much more power a human would have. I need to start recognizing the bad thoughts in my head earlier, I thought.

I guess that’s where the expression comes from, “smells like dog shit.”


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